Well, it seems the Cornell Society for a Good Time is getting a bit lazy as the summer months come upon us… not sure what’s happened to my companions. I for one have been working to finish up the semester and prepare a paper for an upcoming conference. But I thought I’d take a break to sound off on another issue of some importance to me… name-piling.

Name-piling is what I call it when a couple gives a whole list of names to their infant. A first name and a family name are obviously necessary, and I think middle names are acceptable, though frankly I have some reservations even about those (more on that later.) But I think a parent needs a darn good justification to put more than three names on their child’s birth certificate. And in fact, I favor a general trend towards greater economy in naming.

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I just ran across this story, fearfully predicting that Catholics could become “the next Mormons,” fighting on the gay marriage front in the state of Washington. Washington has not legalized gay marriage yet, but only today the governor signed a bill granting same-sex couples the same legal rights and benefits as married couples. Washington is one of ten states with a legislatively passed Defense of Marriage Act. (Twenty others have constitutional provisions of some sort specifying that marriage is defined as being between one man and one woman.) But the worry is that the court will soon overturn the DOMA, and that gay marriage will soon follow. The Knights of Columbus have already gotten a jump on the action, so this liberal writers unhappily speculates that Catholics might step into the role played by the Mormons last fall in the battle over California’s Proposition 8.

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What with all the confirmations that are scheduled this time of year, I was musing today on a question that’s several times perplexed me. Why is it that so many Catholics, despite being completely non-practicing, still care so much about getting their kids baptized and confirmed?

The confirmations are the most puzzling of all. I sort of understand why people want to cling to the remnants of tradition at important moments in life. However hostile they are to tradition and traditional religion on an ordinary day, most people still yearn for some of the traditional trimmings when they’re married and buried, and perhaps when a child has just been born. (Of course, without improperly formed sensibilities, they’re liable to want to mix a few traditional elements with a whole variety of sentimental, inappropriate extras. Still, you can see at least a glimmer of the right sort of desire.) That really doesn’t explain, though, why non-practicing Catholics would want to be confirmed. Confirmation is only a rite of passage within a specifically religious context — unlike weddings or funerals, there’s no secular equivalent. And even if parents yearn for their kids to have a “coming of age”, secular society provides substitutes — high school graduation, for example.

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In honor of the 2000th post here at the Cornell Society for a Good Time, I thought it would be fun to offer a free giveaway. Therefore, if you act now, the Cornell Society for a Good Time will buy you lunch from KFC! Click here to download your free coupon for two pieces of the new Kentucky Grilled Chicken, together with a biscuit and two sides. Yeah, we know how people are hurting in these financially tight times, and as thriving academics we’re prepared to share of our incredible largesse. We weren’t kidding about the Good Time part.

Oh, all right. It’s not really us that’s running this promotion. It’s KFC that’s financing it, and Oprah Winfrey who’s the primary publicist. But the link really works, and as long as you download your coupon before midnight tomorrow (May 6) you really can get your free chicken. If you heard it here first, I expect you to dedicate that first crunchy bite to the Cornell Society for a Good Time and our 2000 wonderful posts.

… and sometimes it isn’t. And it’s funny how, so often, it’s the not complicated parts that people can’t seem to get right.

I’ve often thought this with respect to the laws of the Church, but especially confession. I mean, seriously. Going to confession isn’t that hard. I mean, yes, sometimes there’s a particularly embarrassing thing that you don’t want to confess, and you spend awhile debating just how much specificity is really required. But basically, at the end of the day, it’s pretty tough to shock a priest. He’s heard it all before. I think, most of the time, priests (the good ones, anyway) are less interested in how little or how much you have to confess, and more just pleased that you’re coming to confession. After all, the whole reason they’re in the confessional is to help people with their sins, so presumably they want people to come. And from your angle, it basically just takes those few minutes, after which you’ve got a load off your mind, and can worry that much less about getting hit by a bus on your way home from work and ending up in hell because you were too squeamish to go to confession!

So that’s one case of people ridiculously refusing to do something that’s relatively easy, and obviously good for them. I was realizing today, though, that this is in no way an unusual or unique phenomenon. People are foolish about all kinds of things in life.

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